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Fresh hair, freshly clean body with the nice coat of iodine wipe.

Thats how the day started at 3 am on surgery day. I’m an early bird, but this was early. Eager to get the day going, I was up and ready, drinking my “delicious” sugar beverage. (we’ll dive into pre and post surgical nutrition in a later post 😉).

I’ve dutifully dressed in my easy front zipper shirt for post surgery dressing and my favorite slide on joggers. We headed to the hospital before the sun with zero traffic to adding to the nerves. Man, we were getting there quick!

Check-in was hilarious. Apparently when I’m nervous I get really inappropriate with my humor and take pleasure in making people blush. 😳 So after a few boob jokes and what they may look like afterwards (Hello Dolly!) we were heading back to the pre-op section. During this “time” there were no visitors allowed, so I settled my pre-surgery nerves with text messaging my husband titty pics. Like I said, inappropriate.

After a drop of the gown, marker to highlight the current tissue and a hard AF time getting my IV in, I was ready to be wheeled to the OR. No good dreams, no good hallucinations, no feeling relaxed. This is by far the biggest let down of surgery. I’d love to feel like I’ve slept for 5 hours. But you wake groggy and craving more rest. Remember surgery is a trauma. Your body is undergoing serious damage and needs time to heal.

I am notorious for taking a long time to wake after surgery, but this was BAD. It took me approx. 4 hours (if not more) to come to after the surgery. 😮 I have no idea how I got dressed or in the car; but I do have some brief flashes of the road on the way home. Again no memory of getting inside or to the couch, but Robb documented; so, I guess it happened.

But I DO remember feeling my chest and was like WHOA, those are some big boobies!

Surgery done, and no turning back now. My breast tissue is gone, replaced with silicone bags of saline, tubes draining everywhere and the only thing I need to do is heal.

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Tips to Crush Surgery

• Workout the day before. Get that blood pumping! It will be a while before you’ll feel that again. I pushed the two girls in the BOB for a final run.
• Get in one final romp. It’ll be a few days before you can make whoopie.
• Wake early. You want to avoid missing the 💩 window.
• Wipe your WHOLE body with the provided wipes. I swear this helps you stay fresh in the days after surgery when you cannot shower.
• Wear a front zipper (who wants to mess with buttons) shirt with pockets – this gives you a place to put the drain pouches. My mom added inside pockets to the sweatshirt. Genius!
• Only bring your phone back to the pre-op area. Have your person take everything else from you.
• Pre-make food or have a friend set up a meal train for you. Do not be afraid to ask, you will need help.
• Bring two small pillows (again my mom made them) for the ride home but also to help keep your arms away from your side on the couch or bed.
• Relax, you will be okay. You have made the decision and now you put your faith and trust into your surgeon. Positivity is the key to speedy and complete healing.
• Set your person (driver) up for success by giving them clear instructions to what you need of them and what they need to remember. Robb (my husband) knew he needed to take accurate notes on how to empty drains, treat wounds and what to look for. It helped me relax knowing he was prepared.
• Make jokes, a lot of jokes. Laughter heals. Every time, laughter heals.